How does a husband live it down? A wife just seems to know.
She’d warned me not to close my eyes. She’s saying, “Told you so.”
My wife gave me a challenge last year on New Year’s Eve.
I accepted without thinking ‘cuz my brain had taken leave.
I’m usually fast asleep when chickens close their eyes at night.
So staying up till midnight would be more than just a fight.
I drove to Walmart, bought a case of caffeinated drinks.
And what’s a case of pop without my favorite smokie links.
My wife bought cheese and crackers, and we made her onion dip.
She was ready, but each hour for me I’d call a backward slip.
At 8 o’clock my brain was saying, “Time to go to bed.”
But I shook it off before my wife could call me, “Sleepyhead.”
There were only four more hours that I’d need to stay awake.
Those long and lonely hours should have been a piece of cake.
So at 9 o’clock, I ate the smokies, crackers and the cheese.
Then I drank down all the soda pop. Those drinks were just a tease.
At 10 o’clock, my eyes were drooping down to go to sleep.
Was it time to say this challenge was a little bit too steep?
My mouth was sagging open. I was ‘bout to drip some drool,
when my fuzzy brain connected. It said, “Get to sleep you fool!”
At 11 sharp, I closed my eyes to get a wink or two.
Those doggone winks turned out to be much more than just a few.
I thought I heard my wife say, “Hon it’s almost 12 o’clock.
I must have been in heaven, I was sleeping like a rock.
When I woke and looked around the room, I’d climbed into my bed.
And sure enough my wife exclaimed, “Good morning sleepy head.”
And should I give some thought to every challenge I receive?
A challenge from my wife has left me looking so naive.
So Tuesday night, on New Year’s Eve, it won’t be such a shock.
There’ll be no more celebrating. I’m in bed at 8 o’clock.
